My Long Absence

Today is October 14, 2024. The first time I open my website to update the contents. While on vacation in the Philippines I am confined in the hospital for three times in a row with interval of only weeks. First I was paralyzed, second I broke my spine and third a heart attacked.  

First confinement I was diagnosed Hypo Kalemia with Heart complication. I thought everything were okay. Then I lifted a heavy thing and my spine made a loud cracked. I felt no pain when it happened but in the middle of the night, I wake-up to go to the comfort room, I cannot move.  So much pain I thought I will die that I let nobody touch me. Ambulance was called and again I am confined as the doctor said I must be operated to repair the spine. I am already seventy-six years old and I don't want any operation. At age twenty-four I was operated that saved my life. The complication of Ectopic Pregnancy, my falopian tube bursted and I have internal bleeding.  At age fifty, I have a Cervix Conization resulted to Hysterectomy because of the presents of Cancer cells. With these medical surgeries history I don't want another one anymore. 

After almost four weeks confinement, I was discharged from the hospital and very thankful to God I still can walk without the surgery, only I have to wear a corset or a brace to protect my back, and indure the back pains especially when I lay down to sleep.

Almost a month I thought everything is okay and I already have plans to come back to the Netherlands. For almost one week, I have this rare feeling, when I lay down to sleep I felt I will faint and also in the morning, suddenly my surroundings will became dark only for a moment. I thought maybe I have to go to my doctor, and I thought about it in the evening that the clinic of my doctor is already closed.  I don't know but I have these thoughts that I cannot wait for the next day, I have to go to the hospital that evening, in the ER.

In the hospital, for the ER doctors, I am not an emergency case. The doctor told me that I have to comeback the next day and see my doctor. I can do nothing but to accept it but without first asking the status of my Sodium and Potassium, I wanted to know it before going home.  The doctor then let a nurse tapped blood from me and I have to wait for the result.

It happened while I am waiting. I am talking with my husband when suddenly I felt rare. Then I saw in my mind a table of cells full of lights. One by one the lights were out and I said to my husband I am going to faint and I fainted. My husband panicked and called the doctors and so my daughter shouted "Doctor, our patient fainted and her face was black!" 

They rushes to me and I was given emergency help.

I am confined again. It's a heart issue and potassium. The blood test showed my potassium was 190, again in a critical value. My heartbeat that was always between 35-50, rose to 350. My doctor wanted to put me in the Intensive Care but because it's full, I was given a room next to nurses post and have a monitoring machine for my heart. 

I am lucky it happened I am already in the hospital. I thought I will die and so the family especially my husband. My premonition was so strong and I am thankful to God I have it in me. Almost a month I could go home but my doctor advise me to take it easy. I must take good care of my heart that I even was not allowed to push when doing my urge in the comfort room. 

Now I am almost four months back in The Netherlands. My health is still fragile. Last week my husband dialed the emergency number 112 for an ambulance as I am shaking liked having an epelipsy. I don't have epelipsy and the Medics said I am having a shock because maybe of stress.  I don't know what I have, sometimes I thought it has something to do with the Covid Vaccine. My high blood pressure for two weeks reached to 250/110. I'd consulted my cardiologist and said my heart functioned good. 

Well, I am now seventy eight, I decided to take things one time at a day. I don't want to think about my health issue, nor that my daughter at the moment is in chemo theraphy for the treatment of her breast cancer, or the financial strains. I diverted my mind in finishing my book 'Incarnation - The Recycling of Ranita's Spirit'. It was done and now available in Amazon. And also in updating this site that's neglected for a quite of time. -Remedios Dorio-